Something Wrong?... You Could Say That.

"Week 4, day 2. Birds flew by the windows, leaves fluttered in a light breeze and the suns warm light flooded the room; but inside there was nothing warm or kind. Eagle and Phoenix sat in their chairs with jaws hanging open, Valerie had tears welling in her eyes, dad was just holding mum as she buried her face in his chest, and Watcher looking out the windows with his hands clasped behind his back. Viper stood leaning against the door with a sad look on her face. But then she'd had more time to absorb the information. I stood at the side of the table with my hands grasping it's edge. In the middle of the table sat the little match box with the dull white and rusty red tooth laying on top.
'Bitten,' whispered Phoenix, but in the silence of the room it seemed like an explosion.
'Changing,' muttered Eagle.
'And very slowly?' asked Valerie. 'So you have no idea how long it will take?
'The doc said it might be around two weeks. But no concrete information to make that estimate reliable. I honestly don't know how long it will take. But we all know once you've been bitten it's only a matter of time until the change happens. I'm sorry to have to tell you this. But I figure it's better then you wondering where I've gone.'
'Gone?' asked Watcher as he turned from the window.
'What do you mean gone?' demanded Eagle.
'Well I thought it would be safest if I left. I mean... come on. I don't want to be locked in a room for the rest of my life. And what harm can it be for me to walk around outside? I'm already going to die,' I tried to explain.
'But what if we find a cure?' questioned Valerie. 'We have labs here in the base. We could clear those out and put them to good use.'
'No Val. You know I'm no good with needles.' I tried to laugh, but could only make a small smile.
Phoenix stood up quickly grasping his shotgun. 'Well I'm not just going to let you walk around then come back and try to kill us after you're dead!'
Calmly looking above the barrel of Phoenix's shotgun, I shrugged. 'If you think I'd let myself become one of those brainless bastards then go ahead. I think I can still help until my time comes. But if you'd like to not take that chance, then take things into your own hands.' Very slowly, I stood up and put myself directly infront of the end of the barrel. 'I guess what I'm really asking... Is do you trust me? With the lives of the people in this bunker, with the lives of the squad, with my own life. Do you trust me?'
After a moment of this standstill, Phoenix smoothly took his shotgun and slung it over his shoulder. Looking into my eyes with a crooked smile he said 'Well at least you're not just going to sit down and die.'
Smiling back and grasping his shoulder, I turned to the others and began to lay down my thoughts over the past couple of days.
I'd thought of the 'intelligent' Zombie Private Jake Peters. He was definitely dead yet he could still talk and had improved maneuverability compared to the other Zombies we'd seen. Somehow Peters had died while holding on to some of his intelligence.
The basis of my plan was to go out and back into the city. If I could find out how to keep the brain supplied with air as an infected person died, then it may lead us to find a way to cure at least some part of the plague. Death doesn't have to be the end for us. Or maybe with finding the way to keep the brain oxygenated I'll find the man responsible for coming up with the method. And they may have more knowledge about how to stop the infection.
Of course there's always a chance of me dying before the answers could be found or before I can bring the answers back. But if it's a death by being eaten alive... Well... I'm dying already right?
'But why do you have to go alone? Why can't we come with you?' demanded Watcher. 'Why can't you take the squad? You'd be safer then.'
'I had thought about it. Calling it a mission for the truth. But what if I died during my sleep? I might not make any sound as I crawl from my blanket and take a chunk out of someone else. Besides, I can sneak around easier then the bunch of us can. I'd be putting you at risk.'
'And how is that different from before, Reaps? I mean... we put each other at risk every time we went into battle,' Eagle pointed out.
'Ya. We're coming with you!' seconded Phoenix.
'Guys... Please.' Looking up at them slowly. 'You've never been in danger from me. I can't think of what I'd do if I ever hurt you. Whether I was alive or dead.'
Slowly I turned around and headed towards the door. Trying not to let them see the hurt and fear in my eyes was the hardest part. Of course I wanted them with me. My one fear that stayed with me through this apocalypse was dying alone. Unlocking the door, I kept my face down but spoke back to the others. 'I just... I just can't lose any more of you.' And with that I left the room filled with my family and friends, and went to prepare my supplies. I'd be leaving as soon as possible. Hopefully it would make leaving easier. After all... I'd be leaving my life behind again... This time, for the last time."

Excerpt from the battle log of Steven A. Carpenter. Code Named: Reaper.